Divorce is never an easy process. It makes you feel all sorts of emotions, it can cost a lot of money, its hard on children, and it can take up all of your time. That's why, every day, millions of people hit the internet searching for online resources for divorce tips to help simplify the process and make it more affordable.

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When parents get divorced, kids don’t count the days or hours in the custody schedule. Instead, they often worry about all of kinds of things most adults never even consider. For example:

Who will kiss my pet turtle goodnight when I am at Dad’s house?
How will Santa know where I am sleeping on Christmas?
Can I paint my new bedroom any color I want?

Once your children have their “logistical and technical” questions answered, what they really want, when their parents get divorced, is this:

Kids want to feel unconditional love from both parents.

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Your divorce may impact your children in a variety of ways. That impact depends on your children's emotional make-up and their previous experiences.

Equally important is and how the people around your children -- especially you and the other parent -- react to the divorce and provide comfort and support to your children through this turbulent time.

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Contemplating divorce and unsure how to proceed? It's only natural to feel nervous about finding the right way to end a marriage- which is always a stressful time with lots of uncertainties. If you have decided that staying out of the fray of negative, time-consuming, and often cost prohibitive litigation is the right choice for you, you will likely be on the hunt for a good divorce mediator.

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Mediation is a confidential settlement process in which a trained, neutral settlement expert — the “mediator” — facilitates communication between the parties. Without deciding the issues or imposing a solution on the parties, the mediator enables them to better understand each other’s positions and to reach a mutually agreeable resolution to their disputes.

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When families break apart in a divorce, many parents do not know where to turn to get help.  Divorce lawyer?  Divorce mediator?  What is best when it comes to planning for children when their parents are getting a divorce? Here is some information to help you choose what route to take:

Parents must decide whether they want the fate of their children’s upbringing to be made within the family unit (by mom and dad) or by a judge.

2 min 50 sec read
As the 37 million people who were hacked on Ashley Madison in 2015 can attest, extra marital affairs are rampant. A study published in 2011 confirmed that one in five of the 1,000 people surveyed had cheated on their spouses. What is going on? From what I have seen and heard in my divorce mediation practice, marriages end when couples forget to nurture one another.

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Graine Mediation is pleased to introduce Terri R. Adams, MSW, LCSW, BCD, as our guest blogger this week. Ms. Adams is in private practice in Fairfax, Virginia with the Fairfax Counseling Group. http://fairfaxcounselinggroup.com Ms. Adams has helped many parents of young adults to successfully achieve a stronger relationship with their young adult children and recapture their own future.

1 min 40 sec read
You're looking for the signs he will change -- but thinking you can change your partner is a classic pitfall in many marriages. Though you can sometimes learn to deal with the foibles and flaws of your partner, some disagreeable habits and personality traits of your spouse can become too much to take, and you wind up in the divorce mediator or lawyer’s office.

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Torn between mediation vs litigation? If you are considering divorce, and children are involved, mediation is usually the best dispute resolution alternative for your family. This is especially true if you are the parent who thinks he or she may end up as the non-residential parent (non-primary custodian). 

As a non-residential parent, your odds of building a strong and long-lasting relationship with your children -- by being a part of their lives while they are growing up --  is much greater if you opt for mediation over litigation.