If you are considering divorce, you likely have questions about child support—how much will you get, how is it calculated, and what it is supposed to cover. Here is an easy-to-follow breakdown, with a special emphasis on how child support is negotiated in a mediated divorce. This information is based on Virginia law, but the concepts are applicable most places in the US.
What Is Child Support?
Monthly Payment on Specific Day. Child support is a payment made by one parent to the other, to help cover the costs of raising your child, when you and the other parent do not live under the same roof. Child support is usually paid on a specific day of each month.
Basic Day-to-Day Needs. The purpose of child support payments is to help cover your child’s basic day-to-day needs. It is also designed to assist both parents in providing a stable, safe, and comfortable environment in their individual homes.
Calculation. In most cases, child support is determined based on a formula set by state law. These formulas, also known as guideline’s calculations, factor for both parents’ incomes, the custody arrangements (i.e., the time spent with each parent), and certain child-related expenses. Parents may deviate from the formula amount; but they need to have a very good reason if they want to go lower their state minimum/presumed guideline’s amount.
Can Child Support Be Paid in A Lump Sum? Not usually. Courts do not like lump sum child support payments. This is to protect children from the receiving parent spending all the money at one time and having nothing left when it comes to providing for their child’s day-to-day expenses. Even when parents agree on a lump sum payment, the payer could end up paying double: both the lump sum and a later court-ordered monthly amount. This could happen if the other parent goes to court based on “no child support paid” (because the lump sum might be thrown out by the court as not being considered true child support).
What Does Child Support Cover
Child support is intended to help with your child’s basic living needs, as listed below. Child support is not, however, expected to cover 100% of those costs. In other words, it is only a contribution toward a child’s day-to-day expenses, but not full coverage.
1. Food. A portion of your child’s groceries and school lunches is a key function of child support.
2. Clothing. Child support is expected to cover a portion of your growing child’s clothing.
3. Housing. Child support is expected to help pay your mortgage/rent and utility bills. However, child support is usually not enough to cover even minor upkeep of the property.
4. School-Related Expenses. Child support helps pay for required school supplies and other school-related necessities. It is usually not enough, though, to cover the costs of computers, expensive field trips, and school-related special events.
5. Health Insurance Premiums. Health insurance costs, for your child, are usually included in the child support calculation. The parent who insures the child gets a credit for those payments, and the other parent’s child support is reduced accordingly.
6. Basic Transportation. Basic transportation costs are also considered necessities of living. Child support is intended to cover a portion of your gasoline, and maybe an oil change, but not a car repair or new tires.
What Does Child Support Not Cover
There are a surprising number of important child-related expenses that the monthly child support payment is not intended to cover. Here is a typical list of child-related expenses that child support rarely covers. In mediation, we always work on clarifying how these expenses will be paid:
1. Out of Pocket Medical, Dental, Vision, and Therapy Expenses
Out of pocket medical, dental, vision, and therapy expenses include co-pays, prescriptions, out of network medical expenses, various types of therapy, and other medical, dental, and vision costs not covered by insurance.
2. Work-Related Childcare
Work-related childcare refers to any type of paid substitute care that is necessary for a parent to make a living. Work-related childcare includes day care, after-school and before care, preschool, summer camps (sometimes), nannies, au pairs, and babysitters.
Can you include work-related childcare costs within the child support calculation? Yes. Work-related childcare is often included as a line item within the child support calculation. In mediation, however, we typically factor for this expense outside of the calculation. This makes it easier as your child ages out of their need for substitute care, and when the childcare provider changes their fees. By keeping work-related childcare out of the calculation, you do not need to re-do the child support amount every time there is a change in the childcare costs.
Agreement on Childcare Provider. Most parents want a say-so in their child’s work-related childcare. Thus, it is typical for there to be a clause in your settlement agreement that requires both parents to agree on the specific childcare provider, in writing, before either parent will be required to pay their share of the cost.
3. Private School
Private school is always factored for outside of the child support calculation. If a child is in private school at the time the marriage breaks up, the negotiations concerning tuition can get quite heated if one of the parents no longer feels they can afford private school post-divorce. Some parents require a written agreement between them, every year at contract time, which specifically sets forth their agreement on private school, for the upcoming year only, before either parent is required to make a payment on the tuition bill.
4. Extracurricular Activities and Tutoring
Extracurricular activities and tutoring are not expected to be covered by the state guideline’s monthly child support payment amount. Parents must decide how they will cover the costs for these expenses. Even parents of young children need to consider these costs. Kids grow up fast and you may find that your child has a particular talent or love of an expensive activity that requires two parents to get the costs covered. https://www.avvo.com/legal-answers/what-are-the-stipulations-behind-extracurricular-a-6167313.html
5. Cell Phones
Parents often share the costs of cell phone service and phones. However, I often see one parent picking up the tab for these costs if their child is already on that parents’ plan. This is usually just for the service, though, and not the actual phones.
6. Automobile Insurance for Teenagers
Automobile insurance for a teenage child is often overlooked by divorcing parents; but should be considered in your mediation. Adding a teenager to an automobile insurance policy is expensive. Many parents of young children choose to kick the can down the road on this one, but it should at least be considered in your negotiations.
7. SAT/ACT Preparatory Courses and College Applications
Helping to get your child ready for college, if that is in the mix for your family, is expensive. Some of those costs include SAT/ACT preparatory courses, college applications, and travel expense related to campus visits. Though not an ongoing expense, these costs are worth considering in your mediation.
8. College
In Virginia, all costs related to a child’s college attendance are between the parents. Judges have no power to order these payments; but will enforce a signed settlement agreement that specifies how these costs are to be paid.
College-related expenses include: tuition, mandatory university fees, room and board, books/digital materials, club and Greek fees, transportation costs, health insurance, out of pocket medical expenses, electronics, school supplies, clothing. You will want to be specific in your settlement agreement and stay away from phrases like “all costs and expenses related to college”.
In Virginia child support ends at your child’s 18th birthday, or graduation from high school, whichever is later (with some exceptions). Some states go beyond an 18th birthday/high school graduation cut-off, making the payment of college costs a different kind of negotiation in those states.
How Do Parents Pay for Child-Related Expenses Which are Outside of the Monthly Child Support Payment
In mediation, we spend a lot of time determining how to cover child-related expenses which are not intended to be covered by the monthly child support amount. Here are some payment arrangements that work for my clients:
Pro Rata.
Parents often pay for their child’s expenses, which fall outside of what the monthly child support payment is intended to cover, at their pro rata share of combined gross incomes (called the “pro rata”).
Pro rata refers to each parent’s percentage of their combined gross incomes. For example, if one parent makes $100,000, and the other makes $50,000, they will share their child’s out of pocket medical expenses at 66.5%/33.5%.
50%/50%
Parents often choose to pay their child’s expenses on a 50%/50% basis. This is usually the case when parents make similar incomes. I also see a 50%/50% payment arrangement, even when the parents do not have similar incomes, in the following situations:
- one of the parents has agreed to pay 100% for another expense category; or
- one of the parents is keeping the expensive-to-maintain marital residence for the sake of the children; or
- the lesser earning parent is receiving financial support from a family member (such as free rent); or
- the parents are sick of arguing and want to move on with their life and 50%/50% gets them there without causing serious financial harm to the lesser earning parent.
One Parent Pays 100%
Sometimes, one parent agrees to pay 100% for a particular child-related cost, such as an expensive extracurricular activity or private school. This often comes up when that parent makes enough money to not feel overly burdened by that expense. Sometimes, one parent picks up the tab for a certain activity, such as tutoring, when that parent knows it will just start a fight with the other parent because, for example, the other parent does not feel their child needs tutoring (but is not fighting you on the concept, just the payment).
How Is Child Support Calculated
Child support is calculated using state mandated guidelines. All states have their own guidelines, and you will need to run your state’s specific guidelines to know what to expect in terms of the child support amount.
There are child support calculators online, but I recommend that you also have a professional (mediator, lawyer) check your work. Many of my clients get the calculation right when they do it on their own before mediation, but many do not.
In Virginia, the guideline variables are:
- Gross income of both parents (before taxes and all other deductions, e.g., 401(k), health insurance)
- Number of minor children
- Number of days each parent has with the child per year. (A day = 24 hours; an overnight without 24 hours = 0.5 of a day.)
- Health insurance costs (child’s portion only)
- Work-related childcare costs (sometimes, but not usually included in the formula)
- Court ordered child support for children from other relationships and for children who live in the payer’s home
- Spousal support payments
Once these variables are put into the child support calculation software, the calculator determines the “presumed child support amount” (a legal term). https://www.vacourts.gov/static/forms/district/dc637.pdf
Deviation from Presumed Amount. In mediation, some parents choose to discuss a deviation from the presumed child support amount. This makes sense for some families, but most choose to accept the Virginia state guideline calculation (the presumed amount). They choose, instead, to spend their negotiating time on those expenses which the monthly child support payment is not intended to cover (e.g., extracurricular activities, tutoring, out of pocket medical expenses).
There must a good reason to deviate below the presumed child support amount. Even if parents agree to deviate below the presumed child support amount, there must be a good reason for doing so. For example:
- you might agree to lower the child support payment amount in exchange for one parent covering all extracurricular activity costs; or
- you might deviate down from the presumed child support amount because one parent has family-related debts that they are taking on as part of your settlement terms; or
- the parent receiving the child support money might have free rent/mortgage, a company automobile, or other day-to-day expenses which are paid for by a third party.
Modifiability
By law, child support is always modifiable. That means that, no matter how hard you negotiate in mediation or how hard your lawyer fights in court, if there is a material change in circumstances, and it would be in your child’s best interest to modify the child support amount, the courts are always open.
This does not mean that you are guaranteed a modification to the child support amount if there is a big change in your or the other parents’ circumstances; but it does mean that the monthly payment amount is not set in stone. Some examples of a “material change in circumstances” are a change in income (for the payer or the receiver), a change to the custody schedule (which will also require a change in the court’s custody order), and a change in the cost of the child’s health insurance.
Final Thoughts
At the end of the day, child support is not about the parents—it is about the child. The goal is to ensure your child maintains a decent quality of life, no matter which home they are in.
A mediator will help you create a clear, workable financial plan that fits your family’s situation. A mediator will also provide information about how to efficiently adjust this plan, in the future, as circumstances change.
Still need some help understanding child support in Virginia (or divorce in general)? Call Robin: 571-220-1998.
